Jewels of Matrimony

Was going through a friend’s profile on Hindu matrimony. (she wanted some editing done by expert hands πŸ™‚ I spent sometime in going through other profiles. As usual the site did not disappoint.
First things first. My friend would NEVER pose in front of a bright-Red background, in a neon shirt with her mobile in hand and have the starting words of her write-up as “Myself Naina…”.

– One guy went on and on about his brother while he was the intended candidate. Apparently his brother was well-settled and the “good catch” in the family. Sadly enough he’d already been caught. Toh kya fayda hua?

– One chap wrote (AND I QUOTE), ” i have one mother, one father, one brother, one sister. My brother is married and my bhabhi is good-looking girl from good family and has one cute child.” Obviously the prize catch!!

It makes for interesting reading although I have to wonder how many of them come away happy at the end of the day. Is it wrong to recognise and settle for traits and situations in life which are similar to your own? Why piggyback on someone more upwardly mobile when you can have the satisfaction of doing it on your own steam.

-“….my niece likes to live a nice, simple, hygenic life”. And WE don’t?

“Travelling also suits me during holidays.” The rest of the days I’m an agoraphobic.

“My daughter is convented”. Eeeeks! that sounds awful.

“I am in this position because of my bro & parents. Thanks you all. Good luck bro” Ahem..are we at the Oscars?

The best of the lot so far? An ad that was pointed out to me in the matrimonial section of the Sunday paper a while back.

– “wanted beautiful girl homely caste no BRA.” ????

SWAAHAA!!

( ps: It’s bitchy, I know, to write this way, but one has to read the kind of expectations those same people have. God bless anxious parents and in attention to Wren and Martin…)

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9 Comments on “Jewels of Matrimony”

  1. Mihir Says:

    HAHAHAHAHA!

  2. CruciFire Says:

    ROTFL…its hilarious the kinda crap these ppl write… and damn the kind off expectations they have… i’ve seen a lot of those myself…and some of them put up photos that look like they are one of the many ‘WANTED’ ppl by the police!!


  3. Kindly direct me towards that last guy. Even I want my fair share of girls with no BRA πŸ™‚


  4. @ Mihir – πŸ™‚ kya chikne?@ Crucifire – yeah…i know the ‘wanted’ phenomena πŸ™‚@ Dhananjay – tu kameena hai πŸ™‚

  5. Niharika Says:

    Hi Surya, your post is hilarious! Have been laughing continuously. Its very true that a lot of people expect a lot from their partners but they themselves are not deserving. Subtly put and funnily written. Keep writing such things regualrly.


  6. Wat akka.. U didnt post anything.. very bad 😦


  7. HAHA!God thing I’m still a kid. In fact doesn’t matter really – marriages shouldn’t happen anyway. Waste of time.

  8. Abhinav Says:

    Lol. So utterly hilarious that it got to me.Something close that you may try is the Sunday times matrimonial stuff. Brides and grooms classified generally, by caste, community, religion, profession, nationality, language and what not.Here are some gems from today’s issue:- >>Prfrd Er(?),MBA,IAS etc#>>Reply with Photo and Phone no. at wheatishtall@yahoo.com>>No dowary. Uppar caste no bar.>>Desire tea totler Veg Jain Match.I wonder how they expect people to respond to those pleas in fineprint, that too for marriage. What a waste of precious paper!!!Anyways, loved reading your blog (all of it). Keep writing. My cup runneth over.


  9. Thanks everyone….Sorry for teh late replies…@ Sanjeev – posting NOW and now onwards πŸ™‚


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